A survivor of sexual assault will explain to you that surviving rape is like being killed and being asked to stand up and go on with your life. Nothing is ever the same again. Part of who you are, who you were meant to be is extinguished. For many, it is a feeling of having your soul ripped out and stolen. It is the ultimate betrayal of another human being; no one «asks» to be raped. It is a tool of power and control. And because it is such an efficient method of control, it is widely used across cultures and nations. In areas of civil unrest, the rape statistics become overwhelming. The current situation in Haiti is a prime example.
The use of the term «rape» is intentional here. Nowadays, we are more likely to hear «sexual assault» as this is the legal term and is more encompassing of the variety of ways someone can be sexually assaulted. Regardless of the manner in which someone is sexually assaulted, the effects are the same; it is devastating, but survivable.
Recovery from a sexual assault is a lifetime commitment to change. You cannot simply «get over it» even if it happened several years ago. Once trauma has occurred, the brain and the body remain on alert for danger. Imagine living on the run from an unknown attacker, always thinking the worst-case scenarios. It becomes physically and emotionally exhausting, for everyone concerned.
Healing from sexual assault is possible. It takes time, patience and acceptance. A person needs to grieve the person they were, the person they thought they would be and accept the person they are now.
Healing from sexual assault means being able to accept sexuality as a healthy part of who they are and distinguish it from an act of physical violence of power and control.
Healing from sexual assault means being aware of one’s own body and the sensations it experiences.
Healing from sexual assault means reconnecting the mind and the body; accepting that one can experience feelings and be safe in that experience.
Healing from sexual assault means rediscovering our inner peace and calm.
If you have been sexually assaulted, you can heal and be happy again. You simply need the roadmap to get there. No one should do it alone.
