Published May 19, 2020
Published May 19, 2020
There are times in our lives where there are no words to adequately capture the intensity of our emotions. Those who know us, know how interconnected and close our family is; to the point of us having a family name other than Chaytor. Since 2008, we have become the Core-8. Over the years we have experienced such happy highs and struggled through such difficult lows, but we have always done it together. It is with such bittersweet and melancholic emotion that I have had to pen what you are about to read. Bittersweet because this marks an end to the long journey of the pain and suffering of our husband, soulmate, father, brother, friend and Dar, but happy at the same time because we get to cherish the amazing memories we have been able to make and see how he will live on in the faces and hearts of those he loved.
Jeff Chaytor would be the first to gather any of us that are heartbroken over our grief into his arms and wipe away the tears. That hug would be the warmest, most comforting and healing a hug could ever be. But how do we move on when the person who we turn to is the one we are grieving?
Dad’s life was so multifaceted; from being that little blond boy with three sisters who lived up the hill on Fowler’s Road in CBS, NL, to becoming a world-travelling navy man who retired to grow into a full-time, hard-working family man and then enjoying his transition to his favourite role to date, Dar Chaytor to his five beautiful grandbabies.
It all started with the meeting of Shelley Carter and Jeff Chaytor almost 37 years ago during Frosh at St. Lawrence College. Dad had the pleasure of being awarded the prize of dunking mom in the dunk tank. Their souls have been inseparable since. The strength of their hard work throughout their marriage taught their three kids, Ryan Chaytor, Ashley Lefebvre and Amanda Brasseur, what true love is. Without any hesitation he welcomed Leah, Daniel and Sebastien into his family and home like he was gifted three new children of his own. The icing on the cake was getting to hold in his arms and watch his grandbabies Émilie, Noah Jack, Gabrielle and Jacob, grow and learn. Dad always said that the years with his grandbabies were the best he ever had.
Jeff was the cherished son of Julia and the late Malcolm Chaytor and was a proud brother to Brenda (Peter), Barbara and Cheryl (Jeff). For years he was son-in-law to Mary and the late Jack Carter and brother-in-law and friend to Richard and Micheline Carter and Stephen Carter and Mary Cumming. Grieving with us are his chosen family, his special cousin Glenys Dwyer, his brother and kindred-spirit Brian and Helene Burnett, his chosen daughter Tirzah Lino (Mateo) and honorary granddaughter Violet. He was a beloved uncle and friend to many. That was who our dad was, the safe place for people to land. Throughout the years all felt welcomed in our home. Jeff was also Brother Jeff Chaytor of the Lost Villages Masonic Lodge No. 256.
Now that he will finally be able to rest, he will be welcomed with open arms by his dad, Malcolm, his second dad, Jack, his angel grandson, Mackenzie Chaytor, and his beautiful chosen-niece, Elise Burnett-MacDonald.
Our family would like to express our most heartfelt thanks to Dr. Melanie Waite, Jeff’s angels Samantha Prendergast and Breana Crawford, and to the nurses and PSWs of Bayshore Home Health who helped with his care. Thank you for taking care of all of us when we needed all of you the most.
There will be a party to celebrate his life, just like he would have wanted, taking place when it is safe to do so. In lieu of flowers, Jeff has asked for donations to be made to the Alzheimer Society of Canada in honour of his mother Julia.
As this amazing man, Jeff Chaytor always said, CHOOSE HAPPY.